Here is what I have learned, so far, from traffic school, in which my participation was required by the Orange County Superior Court system because I made an illegal U-turn. Classroom instruction was provided by an off duty Orange County Sheriff.
This is the short list:
1. Restraining orders don't do much good.
2. Harley riders should avoid Huntington Beach because they ticket owners for muffler sound violations.
3. The decibel limit for the exhaust system of any motor vehicle under 6000 lbs. is 95.
4. California traffic cops do not have ticket quotas.
5. Typically the city or town in which a traffic ticket is issued rarely makes any money from the fine. It goes to the state government for school programs.
6. Police officers can pull over anyone if they give a cop probable cause. Almost everything a person does can be classified as probable cause.
7. Orange County Sheriffs have a hard time completing the 'pub crawl' in Newport Beach. They can't handle that much liquor.
8. Traffic schools have a real principal who looks and acts a lot like high school principals, except they wear tennis shoes with their Dockers.
9. If you don't sign a traffic ticket you will be hauled off to jail.
10. Hurricanes Bar in Huntington Beach has the coldest beer around.
11. Policemen are not required to fulfill a quota for traffic violations. No, really this time.
12. Cops give each other tickets all the time. *wink*
13. In most cases a cop has the legal authority to search your vehicle. You can always tell them 'no' but that will only result in a narcotics officer being called to the scene along with a drug sniffing dog.
14. Motor bike riders who weave in and out of traffic and drive in-between lanes can do it as much as they want because a cop will never pull them over due to the safety issues in trying to pursue them.
15. If you kick a door hard enough, it will come down.
16. People from Iowa don't like to drive in LA. Nor do they like traveling in a vehicle doing 80 MPH.
17. Being sprayed by mace is easy to get through. Just stay calm and breathe shallow. Pepper spray, on the other hand, is like dunking your head into a vat of cayenne pepper juice. It feels like fire in your lungs, eyes, nose, everything.
18. Orange County deputies like to pepper spray fellow officers shower towels as a practical joke.
19. For the last time, there is no such thing as a ticket quotta.
20. It takes 21 minutes to get to the court from my house traveling at 50 MPH but only 9 minutes from the court back home, traveling at 80 MPH.
Join the fray by reading through and commenting at the end.
Bet that now you're wishing you had purchased a motorbike instead of that fancy new car.
So do you get a diploma when you graduate from traffic school? Is there a graduation ceremony?
Lastly, did they teach you anything about keeping a camcorder around in case they need to fulfill their brutality quota?
sounds like that was valuable time spent in traffic school!
Because Texas and California are such large states, and cities may be quite far from one another, drivers probably tend to drive faster.
This is especially true in the summer when my AC is out and I'd like to spend as little time in the car as possible.
80MPH isn't really that fast anyway.
Texas & California are LARGE states? Hey, man, me & Greg are from Alaska.
I don't ever recall being able to drive 80 MPH comfortably anywhere in Alaska. Not only are there only 2-3 major roads across (a very small portion of) the state but either ice or a State Trooper were always around to keep you in check.
Glad to see you're supporting the schools! I hear Ms. Roberts' class needs new math textbooks. I guess it's time for you to do another Ueee, eh?
Greg- you are brilliant!
Wow. I near-slept thru my traffic school. As for pepper spray, according to a cop that attends my gym - it can take out a 300 pound gorilla like that. My ex-girlfriend was taking classes at MDCC late nights, so I bought her a bottle from the cop. She jokingly considered using it on her brothers. God, I hope she never did.
So, did someone actually dunk their head into a vat cayenne pepper juice to legitimize the comparison? I would guess that would happen during traffic school um ... recess?