Remember those good 'ole days when the Department of Homeland Security launched a program to educate Americans on how to protect themselves from chemical or dirty bomb attack? Their plan of protection called for dressing up your house in a duct-tape-and-visqueen prom dress, retreating somewhere safe inside while sucking your thumb and rocking back and forth. While it sounded good (pffft, for maybe a day or two until everyone realized that Home Depot was charging an arm and a leg for visqueen and who in the hell can afford to buy as much as they really need to cover their homes when Arkansas is only a day's drive away and everyone knows that nothing happens there so why not just camp out at the local KOA and return when the acid rains have washed away all the bad chemicals?) the plan was a complete bomb. Eh, so to speak.
That said, if the government has taught us anything it's that promoting fear can save lives. If everyone is afraid then no one is not afraid and that means millions of people ready to receive directions and follow them to the 't' in effort to save their own hide. So it is with that powerful knowledge combined with the Johnny-come-lately-'07-blog-words paranoia that we at Team Airbag have taken our brilliant ideas from whiteboard to website.
So comrades it is with great patriotic pride that I present to you the for-real, get real!, application of the blog future. The Airbag Department of Security Blog Advisory System is here to protect lives and restore order, your cooperation will ensure that peace and democracy are restored in the near future.
Join the fray by reading through and commenting at the end.
Way way to hilarious!
I feel more snuggly already.
Perfect. Now if only there was a way for Airbag to change the alert level for purely political reasons...
yeah you definitely need a way to override everyone's alert level.. say, in the event o'reilly actually comes out in full unnatural love for unicorns..
Brilliant, as always.
I'm in. And I'm apparently almost always an asshat. Sweet!
Can I say that you are my favorite?
I mean, without causing your advisory level to drop to unicorn levels? That would be quite embarrassing.
I bet if you say "this is Sparta!" it forces the entire system into a red alert. I know Greg had to have implemented a Spartan back door. Otherwise, up wouldn't be up, down wouldn't be down, and we'd never be twirling.
I take great pride in the love that I and O'Reilly share. Though it will take time to overcome my fear of Unicorns before we can share that love with the world.
I'm in too...and loved by unicorns. Congrats on this - classy.
I'm in.
You know, normally garbage in, garbage out, right?
But somehow you've managed to take two spectacularily shitty systems and mash them up into some kind of pure evil genius. Well done. Very well done.
Just fyi, the title of the page is misspelled as "sytem" instead of "system."
But what an awesome idea. Blog badge'd.
Totally brilliant. Now if only I could find some room for it on my sparse site.
> But somehow you've managed to take two spectacularily shitty systems and mash them up into some kind of pure evil genius. Well done. Very well done.
That's how we roll at Airbag. We take crap and turn it into pure evil genius. Our next project will involve lasers and telemarketers.
> Just fyi, the title of the page is misspelled as "sytem" instead of "system."
Nice. I need to hire an editor to roll in my posse.
This is great, noticed it on IconBuffet. Watch out for those forks.
*still laughing*
@Greg,
I'm available for all your editing/proofing needs. And I can always use freelance income to pay the ol' mortgage. :)
Beyond brilliant. What more needs be said?
> I bet if you say "this is Sparta!" it forces the entire system into a red alert.
Dammit! Why didn't I think of that. Memo to Secret Australian Lab: Add top secret code to force badges to read: All Your Base Are belong to Airbag.
Greg, the secret code could benefit from mentioning it may need a closing script tag, for pedantic coded sites that don't understand sane self closed code can actually be sane.
Or something. Oww.. brain freeze.
Evil. Genius.
I do believe all our base DO belong to Airbag.
That is brilliant!
Aw man, I'm only Tom Cruise yell'ah. Thought I had more *oomph* than that...
It's great .....if only Wordpress would let me use it :-(
Summer, add a closing </script> tag to the badge and it will work fine.
That's classic.
Love it. I'm permanently stuck at asshat. ;-)
> Love it. I'm permanently stuck at asshat.
Welcome to the club. Maybe now we need jackets with sewn-on crests.
"Proud Member of the Asshat Club" ;-)
Am I the only one who has been having load issues because of the tag? Seems to be acting up.
Yeah something is funky. I'll send a cable to Austrailia and see what's going on.