I have a situation. Ramses, our male cat, is uh, having problems containing his number-one game inside the rink. It all started months ago, suddenly and seemingly at random but as time has passed, and after a discussion with Bill the Cat Sitter (who has likely tended to more cats than the Egyptians did back when they built pointy buildings and walked around like they were all living in the game Lode Runner) it's now apparent that this is has become regular thing.
Look, I know that cats age faster than humans but I didn't think that after six years they turned into prunes with a need for a lap blanket and a colostomy bag. Still the problem exists and as there is no veterinary equivalent to House M.D. I am left to my own devices in coming up with a theory as to why this is happening.
This is what I know so far:
- There have been no radical changes to the cat's living environment since moving here more than two years ago save for a slight upgrade to the audio/visual equipment in the living room.
- There have been no radical changes to the cat's diet.
- There have been no radical changes within the Moulton Niguel Water District (concluded through deductive reasoning that as I am also a male, then I too would have a problem with my "aim" if changes had been made to our common source of drinking water, and I can assure you that is not the case).
- My kill/death ratio in Halo has shown moderate improvements over same date, last fiscal year. Not really relevant to this case but all the facts need to be on the table during an investigation.
- Starbucks has improved the quality of their core products and store experience through changes in management structure, training, and upsell tactics. While the cat rarely makes into Starbucks I can understand how news of these changes could have an impact on a guy. Relevant? Remember, think: WWHMDD?!
- The cats have received packages addressed to them specifically, sent by caring "grandparents". These boxes were thought to contain toys made from feathers, drug paraphernalia, and samples of dietary supplements.
It is with all these facts in mind that I have come to one simple conclusion: My cat hasn't been able to hit the side of a barn because he has fallen for spam email propaganda and has started to take penis enlarging drugs. My hunch is that these supplements come from a pharmaceutical company called Phormorenchez but I'm having a hell of a time finding where he's keeping the bottles so that part might not be completely accurate, but I bet it is!
Damn you Nancy Regan! If you would have done your day job back in olden times we would never have had this spam email drug problem to begin with and now it's impacted our home, our lives, eight-rolls of paper towels, and our spare-bathroom tile—quite possibly forever, but hopefully for no more than four hours. Otherwise we're going to have to consult a doctor and at this time of night I think you have to pay them quadruple overtime.
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Maybe try moving the catbox? Maybe simply a change of environment will force your cat to enter a different way and position himself differently. It's worth a try.
Also, try putting one of those lids/ceilings on the box.
I'm relieved to hear that you have not been similarly effected.
Lode Runner was a sweet game.
Excuse my ignorance, but what's WWHMDD?
The cat is obviously lying. Everybody lies, even cats.
> Maybe try moving the catbox? Maybe simply a change of environment will force your cat to enter a different way and position himself differently. It's worth a try.
I tried this and it didn't seem to help. Maybe putting the cat box on top of the cat tree wasn't such a hot idea.
> Excuse my ignorance, but what's WWHMDD?
What would House M.D. do?
I'd definitely get him to the vet; it could be some kind of, uh, thing. That sucks, I know. If that checks out, I like Hamza's solution of getting a top for the box.
From what I know this could be a sign of two things: the first is stress but if there's been no changes then that's unlikely ( no new cats in the area that might be bullying yours? ), or some sort of infection. If it's the latter then what happens is that it's painful for the cat to go as normal so they wait until it becomes a matter of extreme urgency and they are forced to go immediately regardless of where that is.
This could all be wide of the mark as I am not a vet and nor do I play one in a film, however I do know of cats having this problem and that's been the cause.
Short answer is that it's time to see the vet.
Was anyone else thinking for a second that Wil Shipley had killed Greg and taken over the Airbag blog or am I alone in that?
Greg, I hope your cat gets better, man. Have you changed cat litter brands to see if maybe he's more comfortable with something else? Our furballs seem to prefer the really expensive crystals to the clumping clay-based variety. Yay for us. Way easier to clean up, though...
I'm also a proponent of Hamza's domed catbox idea. Makes life so much easier, and less messy. It's funny every now and then to see our clumsy, fat cat knock the dome off and bumble around trying to figure out what's going on. Schadenfreude, FTW.
Greg,
I'm afraid your cat likely has a very serious problem. At about the same age (a bit younger actually), my male cat had the same issues. As it turned out, he had some form of crystalline build up that was pretty much screwing up his urinary system something fierce.
Ultimately, he had to have a penectomy. He was in such pain and couldn't control his bladder, but after - he was a whole new kitty.
I'd suggest taking him to a vet as well. My mother's cat had the same issues around the same age as yours and it ended up that he had some crystals in his urine/urinary tract.
A quick bout of medication and a change to a slightly more expensive food fixed him up and at 10 years old, he's healthy as a horse.
we had the same situation. Turned out to be bladder infection and a slight case of Diabetes. We installed a second kitty-litter box with DIFFERENT sand. Everyone lived happily ever after... well Bandit lived but one more yr.
I took him to the vet a month ago and he checked out just fine but after all of your thoughtful input I think another visit is in order.
Meanwhile I picked up a new cat box that's nearly as tall as the ultra protective super-duper high Mexican border wall. If that doesn't stop illegal pee migration then I'm going to need Senator McCain to come and take care of the problem for good.
It could be that your cat smells the peed-on area.
I'd try renting a blacklight and shining it over the area where your cat's been going where he shouldn't. Any pee that you missed will glow. Then use an enzymatic cleaner on it.
Sorry, no snark. All the good jokes were taken.
Maybe your cat just hates you now and this is his way of telling you to get off his lawn.
... we ended up with the cat having a choice of TWO boxes. He ended up using the two for his different "businesses"
Does he make crying or howling noises during or after he pees? If so, it could be crystallized urine, usually fixed with some medicine from the vet.
Another possibility is that he doesn't like the kind of litter you're using. Sometimes all it takes is a slight change in the formula and suddenly your cat gets all bent out of shape over it.
The litter box might also be too shallow, so he's having problems recognizing the fact that his rear-end is hanging out. One of my cats started "missing" a few months ago and after trying everything, a deeper litter box finally did the trick. I find that an enclosed litter box works better than an open one.
OR....You could get a dog!?!
Sounds like a Urinary Tract Infection to me. My roommate's cat had the annoying habit of pissing on my bed any time he got in my room, but no where else in the house. Turns out he had a UTI and after the meds, he never pissed my bed again. Thankfully there are good enzyme cleaners, too. Oh, he did need shredded newspaper instead of litter while he was healing, tho.
The fact that there's so much knowledge of cat pee floating around concerns me.
A trip to the vet is definitely in order.
Be sure to use enzyme cleaners when cleaning up, as smell can be a big factor, even if you don't notice it. Sometimes cleaning with regular cleaning products can actually seal the scent in, even if you follow it up with an enzyme cleaner - so it's important to use the enzyme cleaner first.
Also, your cat's food could have something to do with it. A lot of cheaper cat foods are high in corn/wheat/rice based fillers, and have ingredients that can lead to digestive and urinary tract infections. You want to look for a food where the first two or three ingredients are meat or mostly meat-based. My cat had similar problems and switching him from Purina Indoor Cat formula to Castor & Pollux Natural Ultramix seems to have solved the problem.
Hope things work out and he's feeling better soon.
> The fact that there's so much knowledge of cat pee floating around concerns me.
And I had no idea there were so many expert veterinarians who are able to diagnose the poor health of my pet, the quality of the food they are served, and the conditions in which they live. I'm surprised no one has called Pamela Anderson to come and stage a daring rescue.
By the way, the new, taller, cat box with more sand-filler-crap (thanks Michael) seems to have done the trick. We'll follow up with a vet soon.