Full on dead cow, lobster, and The Stash; I was ready to fade in-and-out of power naps for the remainder of the evening. The nap, so powerful with its ability to bend time, turning three hours into mere minutes. Slouched, in the best possible position for nodding off while preventing any chance of chicken-head bobbing I was more than prepared to take full advantage of my surroundings.
Fifteen minutes later I awoke, fully, and there before me, on stage, were fluorescent monkeys dancing around a man with a feather on his head, a flute in hand, and everyone was singing in German. I sat up, adjusted the sport coat, and muttered aloud, "Aw crap."
I'm wide awake and there's still two-hours and forty-five minutes left of this season's The Magic Flute.
Now I'm a fan of the arts, especially live productions. I have no idea of the amount of work and dedication it takes to successfully pull-off a performance on stage. That said, opera always sounds better than it turns out to be and I keep forgetting that every time She Who Loves Opera asks if I'll take her to a show.
"You'll like this one," she'll say, "it's about the battle of good versus evil." Little have I learned over the years that all opera is about good versus evil and that no matter how much the plot sounds like a cool lyrical version of The Terminator 2, it's going to be exactly the opposite.
My operatic finger-nails-on-the-chalkboard is how long it takes for the story to move along, never mind that it's either in German or Italian. Take for instance Richard Wagner's Der Ring des Nibelungen, a "cycle" of four operas that takes fifteen hours to perform over the course of four days. Four. Days.
Here's a common synopsis:
Let's see here: Magic ring, awesome, check. Several mythic figures, even more cool, check. Dwarf, hero, betrayal, Valkyries, destroyed Gods? Check, check, check, check, and hell yes—we are so going to see that!
Last year, the Rocket Scientist and I went to go see the second opera of the Der Ring des Nibelungen (featuring Plácido Domingo as the lead no less) assuming that by going on the second night we'd hit the story right in the middle of the action. Now, I wasn't expecting to see Lord of the Rings brought to stage but after four hours of mind-numbing sing-song the opera I saw did not provide the TNT-esque action as advertised.
Based off that experience here's how I would have written the synopsis:
I am under no illusion that opera needs to change its ways to appease my short-attention span. Lord knows they're doing something right if they can continue performing the same show that debuted in the late 18th century. I am happy to support the art scene, but dammit, I have got to remember this next year because Mrs. La bohème is going to want to go to the opera again. And no matter how fantastic the plot will sound; it's going to turn out to be a group of people singing and prancing on the stage with day-glow forest animals in an epic, albeit snails-pace struggle to ask for a glass of water from mildly angry Greek-style gods.
Join the fray by reading through and commenting at the end.
I too was in a relationship with an opera requirement -- season tickets to Chicago's Lyric. I was able to endure it due to my devoted love for her. Also, I had little choice after my counter-gambit, forcing "she who cared not a whit about sports" to watch football games with me, failed utterly. She quickly grasped and appreciated the game, becoming an ardent fan of my favorite team and always expressing appropriate outrage over questionable calls.
If you'd rather not attend the opera, select your stratagem carefully. Learn from my mistakes...
Opera was only thing Jill asked me to go that I tried to sleep through to make the time go faster. Number of occasions I muttered 'aw crap' as well when realized only 4 minutes had passed in my last slumber session.
Opera is about the music, not the plot. If you were falling asleep you either don't like or weren't paying enough attention to the music. You need to pay as much attention to the music as you would to the words of a movie or a play. Imagine watching a movie and paying attention mostly to the music and not the plot. That's what your experience of the opera sounds like to someone who loves that kind of music.
In Opera, and in particular The Ring Cycle, both the music and the plot are important. But you've thought of the music as an obstacle to getting to the plot... instead of letting the music guide and lead the plot along an intense emotional journey.
Listen to this extremely excellent recent episode of Radio Lab about The Ring and you may end up with a very different perspective. You may even want to go see it again.
http://www.wnyc.org/shows/radiolab/episodes/2008/01/01
Also, might I also suggest that you might find it more entertaining to see an opera without planning in advance to fall asleep during it? I just noticed that you wrote that.
I'm not a big opera fan at all, mind you, and most of them sound awful to me. Although I do enjoy listening to the Ring (I confess that I may even choke up at some parts). I have also been known to fall asleep at classical music events due to the hypnotic effects and my own profound sleep deprivation. But it sounds like you're missing out because you set yourself up for failure. You're not giving it a chance, so what else could you expect from it?
"Kurt Wagner's Der Ring des Nibelungen"?
If only. I could probably handle four days of Lambchop, although it too would be a mildly soporific experience. I rather think you meant Richard.
BTW when the Act III started, did you think "helicopter attack in Apocalypse Now"?
@Richard
Bamf
It could be worse. Glen Campbell is performing at the Sydney "Opera" House this week... maybe a little opera wouldn't go amiss after all :/
> Also, might I also suggest that you might find it more entertaining to see an opera without planning in advance to fall asleep during it?
Fluorescent monkeys dude, fluorescent monkeys.
@Richard: Nice, I laughed (out loud) at both points. Go editing powers, go!
Perhaps more cowbell?
I still think that Kurt Wagner is the better Wagner
I have no defense for the monkeys -- that sounds truly awful -- but, again, that's different from and incidental to the music.
What's up with you ADD-driven young people today, can't you get some culture goddammit.
[/sarcasm]
As much as I love classical music, opera is still a real snore to me. Can't help it. It probably has a little to do with how our societies have changed over time - I mean, people in the 18th and 19th centuries had no TV, no movies, and certainly no Interwebz. No doubt that in that entertainment-deprived life context, opera had much more popular attraction power than it does today. We have become so used to loud, fast-paced, whiz-bang, special effects galore, in-your-face entertainment that anything that bucks that trend makes us feel unsettled and yes, bored. Every time I ponder about these issues I wonder if we are really making any progress in mankind.
I've only seen a couple of operas, but am interested to see more. That said, I think that opera is like wine, (or beer): You don't like it at first, so you drink sweet wines that wine connaisseurs may not enjoy as much. You should do the same for Opera - find a fun one that you can enjoy. I reccommend the Barber of Seville, and its sequels - if you've got surtitles so you can follow the dialog it's pretty funny. Maybe you'll move on to enjoy other operas, maybe not, but hopefully you'll at least enjoy the "beginner" operas.
> You don't like it at first, so you drink sweet wines that wine connaisseurs may not enjoy as much. You should do the same for Opera - find a fun one that you can enjoy.
I do that already with shows from Broadway.
Jesting aside, I did like the humor in the Magic Flute but I think that had a lot to do with the person playing the role.
Aaaaaawwwww. Isn't that sweet. Greg made an operatic post that basically says he loves his wife.
I agree, opera is about Music. not a story and explosions
you have to listen the music if not, what the point of an opera ? none.
an opera is not an old way to tell a movie without camera, fx and tom cruise. it was a way to convey the story told by the music and lyrics.
I don't expect explosions or Hollywood special effects in staged performances (though I have seen them, in last weeks performance of The Magic Flute there were a few in the production) but I disagree that opera is only about music.
There is a plot, a story told through acting and song so don't tell me it's just about the music.
This reminds me of a story I read once about a guy who went to the ballet. His description of the plot of Swan Lake gleaned solely from watching the dance was hilarious. I wish I still had that book so I could quote a few lines for you. As it is I am laughing by myself remembering it.
I haven't seen much opera, what I have seen has been ok. I prefer more of the Broadway style shows. They have culture and plot, and even some pretty cool special effects.
I'm with Greg. Opera's about acting and staging and costumes AND music, and dammit, where is all the NEW opera? Don't get me wrong, singing the Papageno-Papagena duet on five cups of coffee is still a highlight of my short-lived operatic career in college, but I want something more akin to "300" with singing. I want something that kicks ass.
You know what wouldn't bore me? This:
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=5542123
Hell. Yeah.
Grendel sings. Bring it.
I realized that my suggestion of the Marriage of Figaro is not actually the first in the trilogy, (and yes, I believe it is a trilogy). The Barber of Seville is the first.
@james: My "other" job is being a ballet dancer. I've been thinking about writing a bunch of ballet plot summaries for men who are dragged to the ballet. Something like Swan Lake: A Prince has to get married, so his mother says. So, he goes out hunting, and while out there falls in love with a swan, and promises to marry her... I'll finish it later.
Greg, as a OC designer who has moved from graphics to architecture to set design and back around to web design, my interests almost always align with yours, which is why I like your blog so much. However, we diverge a bit here.
I believe opera can be the culmination of the arts into one package: architecture, music, dance, painting, sculpture, storytelling. Unfortunately, the degree of difficulty in pulling all that off is so high that it rarely succeeds. By rare, I mean less than 1 in 100. That to me is the biggest obstacle to enjoying opera.
Here are some tips to enjoying it:
Pick the right one. Check the reviews to see if the production is any good. Because of cost, there are few original productions these days. Almost every production that you'll see has been staged somewhere else before unless you live in SF, Seattle, NYC or DC.
I agree with John B. Start with the accessible ones. These are usually the Verdi's and Puccini's. Stick with Italian operas at first.
Lastly, like watching Shakespeare, don't let the performance be your introduction to it. It's too much to process. The performance is more about "how" than "what". Try to listen to it before seeing it. For Shakespeare, try to read it before watching it. That way you aren't saying WTF? the whole time.
As to the relevance of opera today, I agree. Where are the opera equivalents of 300? I can only wish.
How come you don't like Oprah? Everyone likes Oprah.
Opera's not *only* about the music, but damn near so. The music is what tells the story, too -- through the emotional and conceptual twists and turns the music takes a kind of sonic narrative unfolds, so much so that the prose and the plot is, as you say, often perfunctory. The staging and costumes have the potential to be awesome and integral to the experience, of course, and it's supposed to be a spectacle. It is indeed hard to impress modern audiences with special effects, but again if your attention isn't 90-95% focusing on the music -- following the themes and motifs, noticing the changes, allowing the emotions to grab you and carry you along -- you're thinking about the wrong stuff.
Keep in mind also that, as with all things, 90% of it is crap. So if you dislike many operas, it doesn't mean they're all bad. Very few people who know operas, however, would put the Ring in that 90%.
Have you listened to the RadioLab episode I linked to above? I just gave it a re-listen. It's really great and makes you think about the music in ways that you probably didn't even think you could before. If that podcast doesn't make you want to give the Ring another shot, then I don't know what to say.
Very funny.
And yes, Opera is not only about the music etc etc etc - but the fact is, if you don't like people dramatizing... oops, singing, for 2 consecutive hours, then no amount of great decoration can make up for the pain of sitting through one of them.
Even though I love a lot of music, from classic to jazz to nine inch nails - I have never liked the taste of Opera's.
So what? I don't like meat either.
> Even though I love a lot of music, from classic to jazz to nine inch nails - I have never liked the taste of Opera's.
I dunno, have you ever heard Oprah sing? She's pretty good :)
But to be serious, opera kicks ass. Just listen to it. I wouldn't bother with the visual spectacle. For me it doesn't add much, I just like to listen to the singing/music, I can't believe there are humans that can sing like that, it's amazing.
If listening to Pavarotti sing Nessun Dorma doesn't knock your socks off, then I think maybe you're dead or asleep (ha ha, asleep, get it? Nessun Dorma).
Worry not mate. Go ahead, sleep. In Italy, they play chess, eat cheese, drink wine, then tune in for the aria. After that, it's back to socializing while the fat lady sings. They actually PAY some audience members to be there and clap.