This evening my brother-in-law said it best, "I'm getting real tired of this Pat Robertson guy."
Me too and I think it's high time we took a food tube, flicked the switch to 'SUCK', and crammed it into Pat Robertson's mouth — the only medical procedure I know of that might prevent another attack from his debilitating diarrhea of the mouth.
Seriously sweet mercies, how is it possible that this jerk is still on television and that anyone is listening to him? Is anyone listening to him? Scary thought that is.
I've seen first hand how televangelists begin to loose it in their old age but Pat's rhetoric in his elderly prime is inexcusable for anyone.
Pat, stop being a dillhole and knock it off. Nobody wants to follow you and your doctrine of evil. Have you ever considered the consequences of running off at the mouth?
When David Lee Roth squawked about getting back together with Van Halen the band booted him out before they even started reunification.
When Trent Lott suggested the country would have been better off if we had elected a racist as President, they booted him out of the top spot in Congress.
And when Jimmy Swaggert preached openly against extra marital affairs and was caught committing that very sin, they kicked him to the curb and then, uh, rehired him. Ok that's not the best example — now I wonder who was more of the tool there: Jimmy for not being able to find another profession or the congregation for paying him money to get back on stage.
Pat keep talking out of your rear and it's only a matter of time before you become smote yourself.
To anyone reading from the 700 Club (Pat's Club): I think you should take Pat to Savon, buy him one of those M-T-W-Th-F-S-S containers and check him into the nearest "retirement villages" like Seizure World.
Once there, sitting down with a checkered blanket draped across his naked lap, he can ramble on about death by the Divine as much as he wants. After all, the weirder you are, the better drugs you get, served with an extra helping of cling peaches in natural syrup nestled on top of cottage cheese.
Join the fray by reading through and commenting at the end.
Amen?
Amen.
I don't necessarily mind crazy people because you can usually laugh them off, but it drives me nuts when someone is crazy and tries to represent something as meaningful and personal as faith.
It makes someone like myself have to always paraphrase my beliefs with idiotic statements like, "Yup, I'm a Christian, but honestly, not one of those freaky ones."
It also makes sharing my beliefs extremely hard because asshats like Pat Robertson do it for us and try to represent us. Last time I checked, I thought that's what Christ and the apostles were for, not Mr. Robertson.
The shame is that someone in Robertson's situation could be doing real social change in this country and the world by doing things Christ did like shunning money and commerical importance, feeding the poor and always doing so with grace and a forgiving heart.
Instead, he plays off the worst fears in people and pits them against other people to make his own choir feel safe. I feel the Republicans do the same thing. Then when something like 9/11 happens and that safety is breached it just fuels this cycle. Instead of examining ourselves like modern people, we do not learn from history and lash out blindly and without thinking how those actions may alienate and force deep divisions.
Ah come on Jim stop being a liberal wuss, put on your Sunday best, and go smoting. There's lots of ways you can do it: freestyle, steeplechase, and my personal favorite, no-hands. I also find it's fun to go to the annual smote show every spring (Sunday! Sunday! Sunday!) and get a look at the latest in smotes. You really should try it sometime, I think you'll like it.
Its easy to still be on TV when you own the station.
Greg, have you seen With God on Our Side? Stars Mr. Pat himself.
I want that to guy to come to my church so I can land a good sucker punch and break his jaw. That way he can shut the hell up and listen to a good, Christian service, not his incoherent senile babbling.
As for smoting Greg, I prefer the age old tactic of hitting people in the head with Bibles. Large font Bibles.
I'm completely embarrassed by Robertson, and this isn't the first time. I do hope people have tuned him out and don't take him seriously or think he speaks for God or Christians.
Hey, Greg and Andrew, get with the times. The latest smoting method is doing it online now. DOn't have to leave your computer.
At least it's funny to laugh at, I guess. It's horrifying that some people take him seriously and buy into his crap.
...have you seen With God on Our Side?
No, I don't like horror movies.
I prefer the age old tactic of hitting people in the head with Bibles. Large font Bibles.
That works, If I have to get physical I prefer the jaw of a lion, like how they did it back in the day.
The latest smoting method is doing it online now.
I tried joining Smotester but my application was deined.
It's bad enough to have someone like Robertson on a bully pulpit. But what's worse is how many blindly follow him. Anyone have any stats?
Rant by Pat - Rant by Greg.
It's like dual diarrhea.
So I won't bring up that the act is "smiting".
Smoting online.... like ordering books on Amazon.com, you can do it in the buff ;)
Pat Robertson is (small c) christianity's version of Farrakahn. Just as I roll my eyes at Louis, I roll my eyes at Pat.
I tried Smotester myself, but it's glitchy with Safari, and Flash on a Mac still sucks about as much as Pat Robertson does.
Instead I just play this once a day.
Look pal, you can slag Mr. Robertson all you want, but it when it comes to Van Halen and that suck-ass "Red Rocker" that replaced the original lead singer (who admittedly was a complete asshat), you better lay off. The work of Van Hagar is absolute garbage. Long live David Lee!
David Lee was important to the bands history, he definately helped put them on the map, but it was Hagar who recorded the vocals for OU812, by far their best album to date.
I don't know, I have always thought “ignorant remarks are another manifestation of God’s anger.” It explains a lot of Pat Robertson.
I am a pastor from an evangelical tradition. Now I am Canadian so that does make us more Liberal for whatever reason but no one listens to Robertson and takes him seriously outside of his aging and angry base who because they have money (and presumably never have had a stroke) can believe that God is angry at everyone else who suffers.
I do agree with your post, if Robertson was a part of any other organization, he would be booted and I am quite disapointed that other church leaders have not spoken out against him.
I didn't actually watch the 700 Club episode in question, nor do I ever watch the show, but I did read the excerpts reported as "suggesting" (not my word) Mr. Robertson thought the Prime Minister's health was "divine retribuation" -- and I think it's presumption.
You know, when you look for the color red, you usually see it above all other colors. I don't pretend to try and defend Mr. Robertson, but com'on: Is this man really doing harm to anybody else besides himself and his reputation?
I'd like to see (more) similar rants like these for the true asshats of the world: Terrorists, murderers, rapists, spammers and HOV-lane voilators.
Greg, you blaspheme. 1984 is their best album, followed by Diver Down.
Sean S, you're absolutely right. And while were at it, let's have a rant against Bad Things. Because they are like, you know, bad.
I swear, the day Pat Robertson kicks off or has a heart attack or stroke, I am gonna be saying that it was God's punishment for shooting his stupid fat mouth off.
As Willie Nelson says, "If you've got the money, honey, I've got the time. . ." Pat's got the money and the first amendment rights, like it or not. Not speaking in favor, but jes' speaking the way I see it.
What's Savon?
thanks for the link! we appreciate it.
btw - totally agree with you on the kodak logo. seems to be the trend huh? let's all have a moment of silence for att....
I was wondering what Texas and Oklahoma did wrong in God's eyes to be set upon with all those nasty brushfires, but watching Pat didn't clear it up for me. Maybe those weren't divine retribution? Man, so confusing. I'm glad Pat's here to help me understand which specific calamities are Bible-related and which aren't. (PS: I think there should be no argument that Van Halen's first album was and remains their best.)
If Pat wasn't so busy trying to decide which world events were carried out by the angels versus those that just happened on a Tuesday I think he'd say that David Lee Roth's removal from Van Halen was punishment by God for all those years of wearing cowboy chaps with wrestling shoes.
FYI: Savon
I could on and on about Pat Robertson's mumbo jumbo, but you just called him a dillhole. Well played.
I nominate him for King of the AssHats.
Your examples are mostly politicians who lost elections. Robertson isn't a politician, so he doesn't care. As long as he keeps making millions of dollars a year, he'll keep right on keeping on. What's sad is that people give him millions of dollars a year. There's no karmic balance when it comes to paycheks.
I'm pretty sure David Lee Roth, nor Jimmy Swaggert ever made a run for office but this is America so I suppose anything is possible.
Couldn't have put it better myself. Hell, I'm Christian and I'm embarrassed by that toilet bowl. He is only as powerful as the number of people who listen to him, so unfortunately he must have quite a following of...ninkumpoops.
Hell, I'm a Christian too! Who the hell else is one?
He apologized and they accepted. Gosh that almost seemed scripted.
So are we seeing the actions of a man desperate for more attention or just a guy who's caving under a large amount of bad PR.
What do you mean that you've seen it first hand that televangelists loose it in their old age?